Same-sex marriage round-up

Same-sex marriage is much in the thoughts of me and other like-minded Californians excited about its upcoming legalization. Here are some items on that theme.

Defenders of Marriage song

I heard this song on the radio tonight on This Way Out. For those who don't want to listen to it on YouTube, here are some of the lyrics:

Every time we think about same-sex marriage
Makes us sick to our guts
I mean, two people who want to commit to a
stable monogamous life-long relationship
What are they, nuts?
It's unnatural!
Now a man should not lie with a
person who is a guy
He should only lie to his wife,
the bible is clear

Homosexuality is a choice?

Opponents of gay rights often claim that homosexuality is a choice. Let's think about that for a moment...

Anyone who makes that claim is implying that they consciously chose not to be homosexual, presumably due to their moral superiority. If these people were only attracted to members of the opposite sex, however, they wouldn't have needed to make such a choice. Thus, they're unwittingly making a confession about their own sexual orientation.

Flashback to 2004

Here's a reprint of my February 2004 email to family and close friends about my experiences around San Francisco's unilateral (later overturned) decision to allow same-sex marriages:

As you may know, San Francisco has been allowing gay couples to marry over this holiday weekend. As you may also know, Keith and I support gay marriage. I want to share with you how this has touched our lives. I know not all of you support gay marriage, but I know you support hospitality and standing up for what one believes in, even if you choose different causes.

Saturday, which was Valentine's Day, Keith and I stocked up on tchochkes and headed to City Hall in our little electric car. There was a huge line of people waiting for marriage licenses. We went down the line, giving out Hershey's kisses ("A kiss for the bride?"), champagne ("genuine Trader Joe's"), fancy-schmancy picture frames, and our best wishes. I loved Keith more than ever, seeing him heartily congratulating brides and grooms (which, analytical as always, I figured he wouldn't do if he regretted his state of matrimony). We spoke with a reporter from New York Newsday. After giving our names, I told her that Keith and I were married -- that the (temporary and local) legalization of gay marriage hadn't destroyed ours. We weren't quoted in the article; instead, the writer focused on the celebrants, which I think was appropriate.

Sunday morning, I went shopping again for more goodies, including some rainbow candles from the Castro. Unfortunately, the store that sold same-sex cake toppers wasn't open yet. Keith and I went to City Hall in the afternoon. After hearing a bride talk about her Jewish wedding at her grandmother's nursing home, I gave her a pair of big rainbow candles for Shabbos (Sabbath) and mentioned how Keith and I couldn't marry either under strict Jewish law. While we were able to give away all the candles and drinks, there were so many people handing out snacks that we went home with chocolate kisses.

That evening, I read online about people camping out at City Hall so they could be sure of getting married the next day. I made another trip out, with blankets and sweaters, because it was a wet chilly night. When I got home, Keith melted down the leftover chocolate kisses and made us warm chocolate pudding. Yum!

On Monday, I showed up at City Hall at 9:30 to volunteer inside, but they had more than enough people, and I was turned away, despite professing computer expertise. After getting over my disappointment, I assisted people who were handing out coffee, food (bagels and doughnuts), and stickers, and asked people in line what else they needed. I wasn't able to help with the request for a catheter, but I was able to come back later with dry socks and gloves, which were appreciated. By this time, some people in line recognized me, either from previous days or repeated appearances that day.

Everyone expects the courts to issue an injunction today stopping the granting of marriage licenses. We don't know whether this weekend's marriages will be voided. In any case, it will be the start of a state-wide and federal legal battle. For the friends of ours who married this weekend and didn't get a present from us, we'll make a donation to a legal fund in their honor.

I know that several of you participated in the Civil Rights movement. I'm proud and happy that I was able to participate in San Francisco's civil disobedience and civil rights movement.

Historical note: The weddings were halted by court order on March 11, 2004, and legally voided on August 12, 2004 [1].